Priorities in life

Why clarity is important?

Life has become chaotic. Everyone is busy. If we see the people on the roads, we can see that everyone is in a hurry. The youngsters have no time, even for the family. The peers and social media prevail, mostly. The parents enroll

their children in many courses that may make them successful in the material world and help them earn more money and reputation. In such a scenario where the child is fully occupied, to expect the youngsters to have concern about elders in the family and the regular household chores is being too optimistic. Parents do everything related to the house themselves, rather than telling the children. This is true even if the grown-up children are staying with their parents, even after their marriage. Chores done earlier by youngsters in the family has been hijacked by Swiggy and Zomato and so on. Whatever time is left after all these, is taken up by mobile for all the family members. Somehow, the internet has become more important than even the family.

This is the scenario, whether we like it or not. And people say that there is no way out. But is it really so? Let us examine.

But before that, let us see where this scenario is taking us? What is its effect on our lives? Are we assured of the happiness that we feel this fast life style will bring us? Or are we doomed to be overwhelmed only? In this race do we get better than everyone or bitter with everyone, including our spouses and children? Are we losing our sense of satisfaction and contentment in this world, where one has to run to remain in the same place, otherwise we may be left out and behind? The consequences of going in the same mode is disastrous and we are seeing the effects daily in everyone’s life. Individuals are stressed, families are broken, society has become less trusting, Organizations are more concerned on efficiency than employee’s emotional safety. Everyone is living on razor’s edge, afraid of the next step. Why should it be so?

We, as human beings, have different needs, likings and desires. We should understand that there is no end to desire. We need to be mature enough not to be further lured by other’s needs and desires. It would be better to examine them and prioritize our goal in one time frame of a decade or so. Trying to do everything together right now, will naturally put one in unenviable position.

Isn’t it time to rewrite our life story? What do we want? Why do we want those and what happens if we don’t get them?

Most of us, as ordinary individuals, want a life style where the family’s basic needs are met. Our family should be loving, responsible and helpful to each other. We should have also enough money to splurge on something exotic once in a while, without feeling a pinch in the pocket. For this, we must do the following:

1. We must have clarity about our needs, and desires. They should be ours, and not governed by the fact of others doing or owning them. Life should be lived as per our requirements, not in comparison to what the neighbour is doing or having.

2. If we want to live beyond our present means, we should be ready to go that extra mile without any complaints.

3. We must know our values and we should be ready to let go prosperity if our values are getting compromised. The children should be taught these values. They should be ethical and may include responsibility to the family, respect for elders, thinking of welfare of people working for us and gratitude. They must value money.

4. The children in the family should be made to work hard, including doing household chores, even when enough money is available. They should not live an ultra-comfortable life. Hard work builds physical strength and mental character. Comfort does not cultivate any positive quality.

5. Everything that one gets, one has to pay a price. Sometimes, those prices are invisible. (Note: Mr Anil Agarwal, a multi billionaire, owing Vedanta group of companies in India and abroad, said in one of his interviews – “When I was building my business as a middle-class man, the family dinner included presence of me, my wife and my children. Today, as a billionaire I eat alone, with my steward standing next to me.)

6. Under no circumstances, we should abandon our values for gaining something material.

These may still not be able to give whatever we want, but it will give us a life style that will make us contended at the end of our journey.